Ok...Don't Judge Me :/

So I know that just a couple of days ago I told ya'll I was going to BC my hair next Saturday, and I REALLY want to. However, as much as it kills me to say this, I'm actually thinking about delaying it for another month. I bet you're probably wondering why the heck I'm delaying it if I sound so ready. Well the truth is, it's because of a guy. Yes I know, I shouldn't be basing what I want to do with my hair on what someone else will think about it. But see, I haven't seen him in 3 months, and I would rather not shock him during one of the few times we will be able to see each other this year. Although, I'm going to chop it eventually... Ugh!!! I don't know what to do. Actually, I know what I WANT to do, but there's always something holding me back. I really need to just stop making excuses and do what I want to do. I guess if someone can't accept me with my short natural hair, then I don't need them???